The Lion and the Kitten

            Deep in an underground base, where unseen experiments take place, there was a kitten and a lion placed together in a room, both separated by a thick sheet of transparent glass. Frozen in place, the kitten trembled with fear, while the lion salivated and paced in anticipation for a chance at the furry snack. Suddenly, a siren sounded, right as the lights changed color from white to red, following which, two beams of electricity shot out in either direction from a small, metallic sphere on top a phallic pole in the middle of the room; one bolt struck the kitten, and the other, the lion.

            Gradually, the itty kitty began to expand in size until it was twice the size of the lion, which at the same time, began to shrink in size until it was twice as small as the itty kitty. Still, the lion continued to pace, and the kitten, to tremble. As the lights returned back to normal, the glass separating the two began to lower. Statically stationary, the kitten attempted to retreat to the corner, but its legs wouldn’t move, while the lion, scaling the partition as soon as it lowered, ran at full pace, straight for the baby cat.

            After a tiny meow, the doe-eyed kitten arched its back, puffed its fur and tail, flattened its ears, and began to move stiffly away from the small, sprinting lion, as if possessed fully by the spirit of fear. With nowhere to hide, however, the lion eventually caught up and lunged onto one of its soft front paws, sinking its teeth into a toe that the kitten began to flail about, which sent the lion hurdling through the air. Twice more, this pattern repeated, before the emboldened kitten started swatting the lion away. After a couple of choice blows, the lion slunk down on the floor defeatedly, in realization of the futility of its aggression, while the kitten, now reassured, approached it to cuddle. With love and affection, the colossal kitty soon fell asleep on the lion, accidentally smothering it to death, and the experiment was over.